Friday, January 12, 2007

HIGH SCHOOL FILM FANTASY LEAGUE FOOTBALL

Role-playing, outside of the bedroom, is the domain of dorks. And even in the bedroom, the naughty schoolgirl/stern headmaster bit is a little trite. Role-playing, however, isn’t only for computer nerds and neo-Goth vampyres. Sports dorks have their own version: fantasy leagues. Being a sports dork, I thought a team made up of the best athletes from teen flicks would kick major ass.

THE STARTING LINEUP

QUARTERBACK

1st String: Krushinski, (Woody Harrelson) Wildcats
2nd String: Jonathan “Mox” Moxon (James Van Der Bieke), Varsity Blues
3rd String: Tami Maida (Helen Hunt), Quarterback Princess

RUNNING BACK
Trumaine (Wesley Snipes), Wildcats
Jake Ryan (Michael Schoeffling), Sixteen Candles
Jack Dundee (Robin Williams), The Best Of Times
Gabe (R&B star Usher), The Faculty

TIGHT END
Jock #3 (Tom Taylor), Three O’Clock High

WIDE RECIEVERS
Lucas (Corey Haim), Lucas
Kurt Kelly (Lance Fenton), Heathers
Leo Wiggins (Robert Downey, Jr.), Johnny Be Good
Terry (Joyce Hyser), Just One Of The Guys

DEFENSIVE LINEMEN
Ram (Patrick Laborteaux), Heathers
Biff Tannen (Thomas F. Wilson), Back To The Future
Brian (Chris Penn), All The Right Moves
Meat Tuperello, (Tony Ganios) Porky’s

CORNERBACK
Stefen “Stef” Djordjevic (Tom Cruise), All The Right Moves
Tom Donaldson (Jim Meltzer), Four Friends

LINEBACKERS
Charles Jefferson (Forrest Whittaker), Fast Times At Ridgmont High
Billy Bob, (Ron Lester), Varsity Blues
Phillip Finch (Tab Thacker), Wildcats


SPECIAL TEAMS
Cerullo (Nick Corri), Wildcats

THE BENCH

Johnny Walker (Anthony Michael Hall), Johnny Be Good
Reno Hightower (Kurt Russell), The Best of Times
Big John (Eric Bruskotter), Can’t Buy Me Love
Kevin Winchester (Patrick Laborteaux), Summer School
Cappie Roew (Charlie Sheen), Lucas

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